Mentors instilling courage, belief and resilience

Mentors instilling courage, belief and resilience

 “Every child deserves a champion – an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that they can possibly be,” Rita F. Pierson (US educator and child advocate).

We can all remember the adults who have influenced us for good or ill: parents, teachers, a relative, sports coach, pastor, neighbour, shopkeeper – people who shaped our view of ourselves, others, and the world.

Mentoring is formalising and giving intentionality and structure to a relationship between an older mentor and a younger mentee.

For almost two decades, Devonport Chaplaincy has been training, supervising and encouraging mentoring as a means of “making life better, one relationship at a time.”

Mentoring chaplain and training and development support coordinator at Devonport Chaplaincy, Peter Smith, has no doubt life is better for the more than 100 children and young people who have been involved in mentoring in the North-West.

His practical experience is borne out in research into mentoring. The testimonies of local mentors and mentorees included below are added confirmation.

Mentees do better at work and study, absences are reduced, and behaviour is improved.

Peter says self belief and resilience are the two long term takeaways of mentoring.

“It’s the belief that I matter and have worth and have the ability to keep showing up, keep trying, despite the challenges,” he said.

“Encouragement from a mentor over a long period of time is the process of giving another person courage to do what they thought was impossible.

“Mentors speak to another’s potential and worth when they continue to show up each week, listen without judgement, and provide consistency and stability, as well as practical skills, be it driving, budgeting, sport, art, craft, cooking.”

Devonport Chaplaincy provides mentors for primary and secondary students, work trainees and those without the means to obtain their driver’s licence.

Peter said student mentees needed a little extra help as a result of mental health issues, home pressures, bullying, learning difficulties and social awkwardness.

Anxiety at epidemic levels

He said anxiety was at epidemic proportions among young people.

“Kids who can’t handle a classroom environment, who are anxious about everything, from going to school, to relating to others. It’s an all consuming fear that things are going to go wrong.”

Peter said effective mentors needed to genuinely care for others, be patient and persistent.

He said some mentors were with the same students for up to six years, the relationship starting in primary school and continuing beyond high school and college.

“Mentors are helping sculpt a person’s life over time, but it’s a long term process where the results are not always visible, but always worth the effort.”

Many of the mentors are in the later part of their career, or retired men and women who want to give back, make a difference, share their wisdom and experience, “although we are always looking to engage with mentors of all ages and experiences”.

He said the calling was made much more enjoyable and satisfying from the emails, phone calls and stories of transformed lives.

“I can’t believe the change in my child” is a common refrain, often through tears, says Peter.

Mentee Maddy said: “It’s been a great mentoring relationship at a time when I was new to town and struggling, and has gone from just a work relationship to a lifelong friendship.”

Learner driver Brooke Rouse said of her mentor: “Michelle made all the difference. She had lots of patience and was able to explain things in a way I could understand. Getting my licence is one of the hardest things I have ever done.”

Mentor David Jopson said: “The little things you say, do get through over time. It takes a long time to build trust, but once you have it, you start to see positive changes.”

Trainee mentee Emily Elphinstone said: “I don’t think I could have finished my Certificate III in Business without (mentor) Faye’s encouragement and support. She is resilient and confident and has helped me believe I can do anything I put my mind to.

“I remember when I started at Loaves and Fishes, I was so anxious and couldn’t initiate a conversation.”

To find out more about becoming a mentor, contact Devonport Chaplaincy on 6417 3175.